Friday, June 25, 2004

Easier said then done

Here's a funny one from newsoftheweird.com.

Craig Gross, 28, and Mike Foster, 32, run the Christian Internet site "XXXChurch," designed to help the faithful overcome pornography and masturbation, according to a May Wired magazine report. (Recent advice: "Remain calm and tell yourself, 'You don't own me, masturbation!'" Recently, several online "parishioners" commenced a 40-day abstinence, to match the time Satan tempted Jesus in the desert.) [New York Times, 4-19-04] [Wired.com, 5-20-04]
Repeat after me "YOU DONT OWN ME MASTURBATION!"
Feel free to yell that one out in the middle of the office.

Here's a fun one from China, from cnews.canoe.ca, some crazy canadian paper. And you thought they were nothing but a bunch of boring commies.

SHANGHAI, China (AP) - The soup wasn't just good. It was downright addictive.
Narcotics police in southwestern China shuttered 215 restaurants found to be mixing opium poppy into their soups and hot pot stews, Xinhua News Agency reported Friday.
Dishes at the restaurants in Guizhou province contained varying degrees of the opium derivative morphine, the report said.
"Consuming soup or hot pots mixed with poppies for a long time will make you become addicted...and eventually lead you to drug abuse in serious cases," Wei Tao, deputy chief of the Food Institute with Guizhou Provincial Centre for Disease Control, was quoted saying.

Man, I cant stop eating this soup, you musta put some grade A puppy in this shit.


Here's a guy that was obviously inspired by one of my earlier posts, from the good ol' usatoday.com

Man makes 3 photocopies of his buttocks
CLAYTON, Mo. — Police arrested a man who allegedly dropped his pants in the crowded lobby of the St. Louis County Courthouse and made photocopies of his buttocks. Police found Daniel Everett holding two copies he had already made. He was making a third. ''What did I do? What did I do?'' witnesses said Everett asked police. Everett, an immature 38, told police that the copies were intended as a practical joke for his girlfriend.

Cuz threeee is the magic number.
Who you callin immature?






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